Stuart’s Philosophies

Everything we do is watched by others. The way you walk. The way you talk. The way you drink that cup of coffee and the way you chew your food. Even in the way you express emotion in your eyes and in your movements. Everything conveys something in you, and the fire and the passion comes not from what you do… but how you do it.

In the Passion Directives #2, I talked heavily about the pathways of choice. In the Passion Directives #1, I expressed what it means to have alignment of who you are and what you represent. In the Third Directive, I’m asking you to shine.

Two different people drinking the same cup of water will shine very differently. Take for instance someone who has just finished a marathon, and compare that with someone who is simply drinking after being in a dehydrating air-conditioned room. What’s the difference that makes the difference?

1. Challenge and ardor, in a period of missing, longing
2. A feeling of gratitude
3. A sensation that you have given your all… but are overjoyed knowing you have done it

So, if you think about it, it doesn’t really seem like a fair deal, does it! You have to go through quite a lot of pain. But here’s my metaphor for living and success. First, you need to appreciate what you have. The trials and tribulations you go through will help you to see that. Remember the times when you went through pain and problems. After stepping through everything, it’s always worth it.

You don’t need permission from people to do well in something. You don’t need permission to have to create value in the lives of others. If you believe you can add some kind of value to the people around you, go ahead. A lot of us tend to see things as a “give me first before I give you more” attitude. I don’t think the universe is such a place. Whether you believe in karma or some other form of ‘retribution’ or not, it’s always interesting to note that when you do your very best, you create a powerful transformation of thought and action within you.

As you continue to focus on these, it becomes essential for you to maximize your own capabilities. You grow as others grow from your sharing. Shining is about doing your very best. Taking pride in what you are doing. But shining is also about digging deep into the realization of who you are and what you stand for - the richness of your experiences can be simply explored by thinking of what you want in your life, and then asking “is that all that you want”. There’s always something more. We are creatures who strive to achieve and actualize our potential. But that can’t happen if there are no challenges.

Let’s not forget that brilliance is comparative in nature. You find something bright only if you can see it contrast and stand out from everything else. Yet, one candle only lights up a small portion of the room. What about a team, like a group of colleagues or a family unit?

Jim (whose real name shall remain undisclosed), a senior manager in a company, had a very strong capability for leadership. He had proven this many times around, and he kept doing what he was doing, until a few of his fellow colleagues became jealous. They looked at his efforts as outshining them and “spoiling the market”. Secretly, they plotted to discontinue their efforts in supporting him. As time went by, Jim found it excruciatingly difficult to get support from others. In many moments, he found that all his efforts were counterproductive, and that he was bearing a huge burden. I had a discussion with him and told him that he had been sucked into a systems problem. People didn’t like him very much because they misinterpreted what he was doing. More importantly, he did not fully communicate his intentions. He had also ignored the fact that other people needed to sometimes feel important as being part of a team. Jim’s awareness of this issue allowed him to take a step back, and as a leader, deferred his judgments and asked his able colleagues their frank opinions. Soon, he found himself crawling out of the darkness and into the light again. In fact, it seemed so much easier that he could reach his goals and outcomes without having to do it himself - and indeed he found others could do it better than he could.

My example above is really to highlight the case that shining is not just about ourselves. Sometimes, others have a spark, and we should not deem shining as an individual thing alone. If you are a part of a team, the Passion Directives are just as much about you helping everyone in the team to shine.

In recent days I’ve been speaking to my own team members and colleagues about what they are looking forward to in the new year and how they are planning for it. It’s interesting to know that they have a strong vision for themselves, so as a mentor and leader, how well I shine depends on how well I can fan the spark into a blaze. Perhaps this puts into context your observations about yourself and where you intend to go for your new year.

Tags

General, The Passion Directives