Finding Purpose Part 3

You know the old adage "Confusion means you are learning". I'd like to update that a bit - being aware and acknowledging that you are confused means you are learning. For most part of 2005, I was confused and was battling a lot of the confusion inside myself. A whole series of things seemed to go wrong including relationships, work, and family. So, in a wild attempt to supress these, I admit I ignored the problems for a bit too long, and perhaps that was the reason for a fairly strange level of ineffectiveness in my own ability to manage my emotions for some time. Until I realized that I wasn't going the way I wanted to go.
I think I really came to terms with it after I stopped being in the emotion and started to gain awareness of it, and acknowledged that it was a problem. It wasn't easy - in fact it was quite painful, like a new baptism of fire. It reminded me a lot of the idea that purification often comes with extreme situations. So the changes began to take place in November of 2005. Today, I think I'm much more balanced, and many things have fallen in place for me.
When you are aware and you know yourself, answers usually come. In my opinion, the most amazing thing about 2006 is the sense of renewal, and from out of confusion, there was clarity. I realized that learning to gain perspective is not easy - that awareness of what isn't working right brings with it a very important decision: to change for the better.
With it, comes a question - what are you hiding?
Perhaps you've never considered this question. Perhaps you are not aware that you are hiding the truth behind your actions because the truth can hurt. But... it's a very important question to confront yourself with every day.